Major Cover Up at HESC
What is this I hear you cry? Do we have financial
irregularities to make the Euro issues look like a petty cash miscount? Or, better
still, is it salacious gossip involving improper relationships?
Well the problem does relate to some particularly
tenacious and not all together well behaved young ladies, who are not in the
least fussy, if its men or women, with whom they enjoy a brief, but close and ultimately
painful, relationship.
Yes, the HESC Mozzies are out in force and getting their teeth
stuck into anyone who leaves exposed flesh available. Most perilous areas at
the moment seem to be along the pathway between the woodland and far hides, but
you are liable to be mugged almost anywhere on the reserve.
Although the majority of mosquitos in this country do not
bite humans, a number of species are more than willing to have a go including: Culex pipiens (biotype molestus) which can be a
nuisance biter in localised areas, where it mainly breeds underground. Other species partial to a drop
of vin du permit holder, include: the woodland mosquito ( Ochlerotatus cantans), and
Culiseta annulata which may be found in urban areas, early and late in the
year.
In all cases it is only the female that bites.
The answer? Well
you take your choice, having had a
number of itchy, swelling lumps on my arms neck and face, I recommend long
sleeves, definitely do not wear shorts and maybe try one of the proprietary
insect repellents. My old and very effective standby, for keeping the Highland
Midge at bay, Avon Skin So Soft, does not appear to keep the HESC Buzzing
Belles from performing transfusions, on me at least.
British “mozzies” do not carry malaria, or at the
moment, any other serious diseases, but,
if you want to avoid some irritating and unpleasant sore lumps on your
personage, please take care and try to cover up as far as possible.
I was going to say, "There ain't no flies on you." But I suspect I'd be wrong.
ReplyDeleteOh No - more biting satire!
ReplyDelete